life's not that funner.. not that funner at all. Im fallling into a deep dark hole.. and I hate it alot. I dont want it anymore. Not for another second of my life... I want the old responsible me back.

I dont know what to do about the other half of me though.

I am sorry I am not everything you wanted. I can't be more than I am. I can't pretend to be someone that you love more, because well thats just unethical.
I see it; The discontent you feel with me. I see the look you give her.. the praise you show her each day. I am sorry thats not me. I'm sorry.

I am me. Take it or leave it. From recent trends- maybe we are moving apart? I dont really know. I hope not. Am I seeing this all wrong? Time will tell-- and I will give it time. Maybe there is still hope?

<3 Love ALWAYS, and I do love thee, alot.

Have you ever thought to yourself that life couldn't get any busier, or more complicated, but then it does?
Or that everything is going really great and smooth, but then it gets incredibly turbulent and crazy?

GOD! that's all life has been lately. Program after program, duty night after duty night, with very little time to spare. I really can't take a lot more of this. I really just need a break.. even if its just a short one.



"Before I lose control, there's just one thing you should know...This is for real." <3<3

I really miss her. She's like my best friend..and I never get to talk to her anymore.

I'm working a NEW me :)